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Some people had asked me for an example of what it’s like in my weekly Mastermind Meeting.  For this particular group our meetings are not very formal.  We basically go around the table discussing our current and upcoming projects, sharing successes and challenges, and being open to coaching from each other.  If someone is stuck on something, we give advice.  If someone needs a resource, we open our contact lists.   It’s all about sharing and helping each other get to that next level.

Much of what I receive each week comes as gold nuggets.  Here’s an example that I made a point to record and share with you. It was towards the end of our last meeting and I asked my friend Kris Kiler the question, “What was the lesson you’ve learned in your business life that gave you the biggest return?”  Click below to listen to his answer. (BTW – sorry for the occasional variance in volume. I had to boost up some portions that were hard to hear.)

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How about you? Share your most profitable lesson in the comments area below.

This is a story that a former manager had shared with me years ago (thanks, Mark!).  I recently heard it again and I wanted to share it with you.

I was talking to a friend the other day about a project we were both working on.  One of her struggles had been taking more of a lead with a certain aspect of our project, and as a result she wasn’t taking action.  She revealed that she didn’t feel comfortable with it because she needed to first build more self-confidence.  She thought that once she had that,THEN she could take the necessary action.

At that point I said something that absolutely shocked her, as it probably would most of you reading this.  I looked her square in the eye and said, “That’s a myth.  You don’t need self-confidence to do anything, much less be successful.”

Imagine that you are on one side of a large city freeway.  Between the flashes of speeding cars, some going 80 miles per hour, you see me on the other side.  In my hand I hold a crisp $100 bill.  I shout to you over the sound of wind and tires on asphalt, “This cash is yours if you can cross the freeway and reach me.”  Now, $100 is nothing to scoff at.  In fact, I think most people wouldn’t mind having the cash in some fashion.  And while there are some skilled daredevils that would try their hand at crossing, I’ve found that most people wouldn’t even entertain the thought in this case.

Now imagine the same scenario, but instead of me on the other side with a $100 bill, it’s the person you care about most in the world.  And instead of holding cash in their hand, they’re holding their stomach.  It’s a bit hard for you to see anything clearly because they’re doubled over on the shoulder and close to rolling into the car lanes.  The faint sound of their moans floats between the speeding traffic to your ears.  You can’t see if there’s blood, but what you can see is them writhing in pain.  You are their only hope of survival before they roll into the lanes of traffic.  In this situation, would you hesitate for one second to run across to come to their aid?  Most people that I’ve spoken with give a resounding, “I wouldn’t hesitate one bit!”

It’s not about filling a bucket in our head labeled “self-confidence”.  Taking action comes from having strong purpose, having the compelling “why” that pulls you like a magnet to your desired outcome.  Have a strong enough purpose and the “need” for self-confidence disappears.

Right now, give yourself a wonderful gift.  Take a few minutes to write down your “why”, your purpose for doing the things you do.

The other day, as I stopped to fill the gas tank of my car, I went into the convenience store and got a bottle of water.  When I had filled my tank and got back into my car I proceeded to screw the cap back onto my water bottle.  It started out okay, but then it just got more difficult.

After confirming that I was twisting it the right way by reciting the mantra “righty tighty, lefty loosey”, I decided that it was just being stubborn and that I could force it back on.  After all, I was a big, strong guy!  So I twisted and twisted, my fingers gripping ever so tightly on the ridges of the tiny plastic cap.  I don’t know how much I really turned the cap, but I was exerting so much force that I was convinced it HAD to be on as tight as it was ever going to be.  With little beads of sweat on my forehead, I smiled at the thought of yet another challenge conquered! With a smug smile I tossed the bottle into the passenger seat.

Then, as if in slow motion, I see the bottom of the bottle bounce off the cushion and the white bottle cap easily pop off!  “Noooooo!”  Water gushes out of the bottle, splashing my dashboard and soaking my cushion.  Defeated, I get out of my car to grab a handful of paper towels.

If only I had taken the time to turn the cap to the left to make sure the threads of the cap and the bottle were aligned, I would have saved myself the time and trouble of drying out the interior of my car.

Now I’m not saying this applies to more than just water bottles.  I’m not even suggesting that from time to time it would make a great deal of sense to step back and notice if there’s an easier way to go forward.  What I AM telling you is that before you do anything, you may now want to make sure that your efforts are in alignment with your greater purpose.

Most people are familiar with the saying that, “Anything worth doing is worth doing well.”  Like you, I heard it many times growing up.  And I get where it comes from.  We want others to succeed.  We seek out great performances.  We love celebrating victories.

However, most people are so focused on doing well that they’ve paralyzed themselves from even taking the first step and instead do nothing at all!

Picture this.  A young boy sits in the living room of his house, eyes glued to the television set.  He’s watching the final match of the 1985 Wimbledon Men’s Singles between Boris Becker and Kevin Curren.  After an exciting and grueling four sets, which included quite a bit of leaping and diving across the court, Becker becomes the youngest Wimbledon champion at 17 years of age.

Becker’s amazing performance inspires the young boy to pick up a tennis racquet and step on the court for the first time.  He tosses a ball into the air and swings for it, but instead of an incredible, low passing shot over the net, the ball lobs backwards over the fence surrounding the tennis court.  Discouraged after such an embarrassing attempt, the boy walks home defeated.  It would be another four years until I picked up another tennis racquet.

I placed such a high value on performing well that I’d forgotten that top performance is something that must be developed. How ridiculous was it for me to expect a perfect Wimbledon-worthy performance at 9-years-old!  Yet that’s what most people do every day, talking themselves out of that new investment, or new career path, or new relationship.  That’s why I much prefer this adaptation of the saying:

“Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly – at first.”

It’s not about perfection, it’s about PROGRESS.  Progress comes from improvement.  Improvement comes from doing better.  To do better, you’ve first got to do poorly.

So here’s the new and improved game plan:

1. Just do it (i.e., get started)
2. Suck it up (i.e., naturally do poorly)
3. Learn from your sucking
4. Suck less next time

PS – Shortly after I started focusing on getting better rather than being perfect, I picked up a tennis racquet for the second time and soon made my high school tennis team for 3 years and eventually lettered.  It wasn’t a Grand Slam cup, but looking back at how I’d progressed it felt outstanding!

A friend recently shared with me that he wanted to lose some weight.  Being familiar with the goal-setting principle of fully associating with the end result, he shared his vision of himself 30 pounds lighter, how he saw all the wonderful things he’d be able to do and share, and what it all really meant for him.  I was really happy that he had taken these important steps that most people fail to take.  After congratulating him I asked him something he didn’t expect.

“What color is your yardstick?”
“Excuse me?”
“Your yardstick.  What color is it?”
“I’m not sure that I follow.  I haven’t seen one of those since Catholic school.”

I explained to him that he had done a fantastic job of identifying what he wanted, and that having a clear vision alone wouldn’t instantly make the pounds disappear.  In order to see that he was actually moving towards his goal he needed a measuring device – a “yardstick”.

A yardstick helps you to answer a very important question:  How do I know that I’m making progress towards my goal?

After some thought he said that he’d read a book that had examples of other people’s workout and nutrition plans for losing weight.  Maybe he could use those as his yardstick.  I applauded his resourcefulness, that having role models was a great idea.  Then I repeated the question.

“What color is your yardstick?”
“Umm, white, I guess.  Since the pages in that book are white.”
“That’s a great start!  And as you go forward now you’ll probably want to color it.”

After pondering that for a minute, he understood. ”You mean I have to make it my own.  I can take their example to start with, and then tweak it to my own personal taste.”

“I couldn’t have said it better myself!”
“Yeah, right.  You could have just told me what to do right from the beginning.”
“Where’s the self-discovery in that?  So, do you want to pick up markers or paint?”
“Crayons, thank you very much.”

The other day my wife came back from giving blood. She
said that the donation took her longer than usual because she started feeling a
bit lightheaded after getting up from the procedure.  She decided to sit in the lobby until she felt better.  Unfortunately that caused her to overstay the limit at her metered parking space. When she
came out of the clinic there was a $45 parking ticket on her windshield!

Determined to contest the fine, she asked me what she could say.  I said that I thought that the parking authorities would thank her for thinking about the safety of others (not to mention
giving blood), rather than have her rush to get out of the clinic, drive with
impaired mental faculty, and potentially cause an accident.

She laughed at the concept and suggested that I go talk to them
instead! When I asked her why, she said because I was better at saying
those words than she was. And the exchange continued:

Me: Well, the best way to get better at something is by doing it.

Her: But I’d learn better if I saw your example first.

Me: Then you can keep on replaying your conversation with them many
times in your head, with many different scenarios, which would be more
powerful than just my one example.

Her: Well, it’s your money too, so you should take part in the solution.

Etc., etc. We kept one-upping each other!

I can imagine you’ve experienced similar situations: trying to get
someone else to do something for you, get out of doing something, or
change someone’s mind about a subject.

Maybe you could now practice it for fun! Find someone you can play with.
Person A will say a statement (e.g., tell person B to do something,
state an opinion). Person B comes up with a different way of looking at it. Then Person A does the same, and so on.

See how long you both can go, and who “wins” with the last word!

Growing up as a child of the Eighties, one of my favorite television heroes was MacGyver.  For those unfamiliar, the show was about a secret agent that could get out of any situation simply with his ingenuity.

If you’re thinking James Bond, “Mac” was far from it.  He carried a Swiss Army knife and duct tape instead of a gun and traded the tux for a mullet.

Despite the unfortunate haircut, Mac was the coolest thing an aspiring teen geek such as myself could aspire to become.  He was good looking, witty, sometimes got the girl, and ALWAYS saved the day.

While being a genius definitely helped, the true key to MacGyver’s success was that no matter what rough spot he may have found himself, I’m positive he always ask himself the following question:

“How can I use this?”

By asking himself that one question, he found solutions where most others found despair.

• “I want to get out of this locked room and have nothing but the light fixture.  How can I use that?  Make a lock pick out of the lightbulb filament!”
• “I’ve got to use this car with a bullet-riddled radiator and I’m on a farm miles away from a garage.  How can I use what I’ve got?  Pour the whites from chicken eggs into the radiator to plug up the holes!”

So as you now imagine things that may have put you in a tough spot in the past (e.g., a friend standing you up, your spouse yelling at you, a prospect saying “no”), play the MacGyver Game and ask yourself that all important question and see all the solutions you can come up with.

FYI – if you want to get a MacGyver fix, CBS has posted all the episodes on YouTube.

If you took a couple of minutes now and someone asked you, “What is your favorite movie and why?” what would you write down?

Today I would say Raiders of the Lost Ark.  So many great moments!  I remember the quiet tension during in the first scene when Indy was about to switch the bag of sand for the gold idol.  And when he was running away from that giant rolling ball – WOW!  How cool was that!  And then there was that part in the market with the big black-robed guy with the even bigger sword – I was laughing my head off!  And how about the bad guys’ faces melting off when they opened the ark.  What an exquisite rollercoaster of emotion packed into a 2 hour theatrical journey!

As I was recently watching some behind-the-scenes footage from the DVD bonus features, feeling in awe of everything that came together beautifully to give me such an incredible experience, one thing stood out above all else.  With the entire crew looking on, a sharp clap sounds, and everyone hears those familiar words, “And… ACTION!”

Before they were able to load any film into the camera, George Lucas and Steven Spielberg spent years and millions of dollars writing, discussing, revising, and planning.  And all of it was to prepare for that moment of taking ACTION!  Could they have spent even more time talking and preparing?  Of course!  But that’s why they always use those other words:  “Take two!  Take three!  etc.”

Like you, they knew that it isn’t about discussing or intellectualizing or “knowing” something in your head.  It’s about DOING and taking ACTION!  If bodies didn’t move, if the actors disregarded that call to take ACTION, there would be no movie, no awards, and no incredible experience for millions of grateful people to remember and relive and share with others for years and years to come.

So as you hear those familiar words again…

As you plan your day or week, I can imagine that you, like many of us, have all sorts of ideas and fragments and snippets floating about you.  And you’re determined to grab as many as possible with your mental fishing nets and toss them into your “To Do” bucket.  What did she ask me to pick up?  Who did I want to see before the end of the day?  What’s that feeling behind me reminding me to do?  Where did I leave that thing?

All those many questions asked, trying to remember things you’ve forgotten, in an effort to “be productive” and “get it done”.  It can be so very dizzying.  At times I’m sure it’s downright frustrating!  And while asking those questions and doing those things may be very necessary, there’s something else you may want to put right in front of you now and answer for yourself:

• What have I forgotten to celebrate?
• If there were something, ANYTHING – the tiniest little thing, I could let myself celebrate, what would that be?
• If I really allowed myself, if I gave myself permission, what could I celebrate now?

Don’t misunderstand what I’m trying to get across here.  I’m not saying that you should make this easy for yourself, set yourself up for success, and really have fun with it.  What I AM asking you to do is the following:

1. Turn up your speakers
2. Click the following link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YwEMxYggoKQ
3. Ask yourself the “celebrate” questions from above
4. Capture your answers on paper (afterward you can put it somewhere you’ll see it throughout the day)
5. Do what the guys on YouTube are telling you!

“We’re gonna have a good time tonight!  Let’s cele…”  Sing along!  You know you want to!